Oh, what a piece of crap is man
Shallow as a biscuit pan
Leaves behind a trail of stink
Pees into a restroom sink
Eats a sausage off the floor
Tongues a ruddy canker sore
Vows to read a book, instead
Masturbates and goes to bed
With this refrain do I depart:
Man, what a piece of crap thou art.