I have a book from the 50s with lots of little zen koans and parables and whatnots. Since I believe all the koans come from old ink paintings, they are probably in the public domain, and therefore ripe to be reappropriated on a semi-regular basis for a continuing series [1 , 2] I call The Temple Lessons.

1.
With his calligraphy brush on a sheet of paper the master Kosen drew the words “The First Principle”, which are carved over the gate of the Oaku Temple in Kyoto.

Tokusan, A pupil of the master, had mixed the ink for him. He stood by, watching the master’s calligraphy.

Tokusan looked at the master’s first effort and said: “Not so good!”
Kosen tried again.
The pupil said: “That’s worse than the first one!” and Kosen tried again.
On the fourteenth try, Kosen held up the paper. Tokusan began to cry and ran out of the temple. Kosen had written a haiku which insulted Tokusan’s mother.

“Contemplate that,” Kosen called out, laughing.

2.
Sekiso said: “A man sits on top of a hundred-foot pole. How can he go farther up?”
A master answered: “He should reach for enlightenment. Then he can stand up into all four corners of the sky at once.”
Everybody at the table fell into an awkward silence. A few moments passed in this manner. The master who had answered was new to the temple, and wanted the other masters to like him.
Finally, another master cleared his throat and said: “You don’t have to try to impress us.”
“The correct answer was, he could jump up,” said Sekiso.

3.
Baso passed a monk on the road. He said to the monk: “If I see you have a staff, I will give it to you. If I see you have no staff, I will take it away from you.”
“What?” said the monk.
“I’m sorry, I thought you were someone else,” apologized Baso.
“Who?” asked the monk.
“My friend Joshu,” said Baso.
The monk asked: “What’s this about a staff?”
“It’s sort of this joke we have,” said Baso.
“Do you want my staff?” said the monk.
“No, really, I’m sorry, I just thought you were..” said Baso.
“Here, take it, I’m almost to the temple anyway,” said the monk.

He left Baso standing in the road holding his staff. At that moment, Baso attained enlightenment.